The Disappointing Clown Company’s strapline is: ‘Book early to avoid satisfaction’.

Just as it say’s on the tin, The Disappointing Clown Company offer a range of positively under-whelming activities including ‘Crap Face-Painting’ - as we only have two colours; no brushes, no talent or enthusiasm; plus we hate kids AND face-painting. So if this is not to your taste, maybe you might like our rubbish balloon-modelling? If so, you can chose from a range of designs such as: a ruler, a snake, a worm, a sword (but without a handle) or our speciality - the upper intestine.

Pig Racing is one of our most popular routines - with Lord and Lady Canardly-Waulk helping to cheer on your chosen pig - whether that be Hamlet, Scratchin’, Francis Bacon or any other of our famous hogs. Rest assured that of any pigs are injured, oinkment will be applied immediately and a hambulance will be called. ‘Owl-Boy’ is another smashing act. So, don’t miss this freak of nature - that his half man, half beast. Audience members can get fully involved by feeding him mice-cream, asking him lots of wise owl questions before the grand finale; owl-boys famous 360 head turn!

This act can be booked as a fixed or walkabout routine and is ideal at festivals and other outdoor or indoor events.